A many-splendored love and hope story

August 11, 2009
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Superman and Lois LaneSo then there was Superman and his Lois Lane.  In this allegorical superhero story my Cardiologist and Internist are represented by this famous pair.  Although they didn’t do the hunting nor the cutting and correcting, these two gave light and warmth where it was needed…and they are married and in love.  Through the use of modern technology and know-how my Superman Doctor found the damaged tissue in my heart.  And my Lois Lane Doctor, she knew how to relate to me; regular human to regular human.

Superman Doctor was an interesting man because I imagine when he’s dressed in normal clothes, nobody would suspect him to be a doctor.  He’s a very soft-spoken man, so matter of fact with his diagnosis, you wonder if and how they could be true.  My doctor had a much easier time being who he was, he wasn’t burdened with a secret identity, and he didn’t labor anyone with long explanations of how he knew what he knew.  He had a white coat.  And like Superman’s signature spandex suit, that made him pretty credible.

Dr. Superman with his sparkling teeth and handsome voice located the most dangerous puzzle piece of all; the vegetation within my heart.  No, we’re not talking about vegetation like a carrot with a mean face telling my heart  to  “stick ‘em up.”  But that’s an interesting cartoon scene to let play out in your head.  The kind of vegetation I am referring to is built up dead bacteria tissue; unwanted, unnatural and the kind that causes inflammation of the heart valve. Once this build up of the dead bacteria was found, it had to be removed before it broke off and settled somewhere important, like in my veins, or gasp-in my brain.

Nerve racking stuff ay? I mean who wants to be held up by a vegetable?  Sometimes all of this medical talk, diagnoses, drugs and crazy cartoons going on in my head made me feel quite emotional, scared and lost.  Thank goodness for my Lois Lane Doctor. She was my Internist, and the sincerest of all my doctors.  Just because she’s not represented by a Superhero does not mean she lacks the moral fiber of the rest of the gang.  She was super in her own right, and kept all of the other hero egos in check.

She was so caring and the most relatable doctor.  Some might call it bedside manor but I recognized it as sincere consolation. Without the power to fly, an iron suit, or a Russian accent, she helped me by being a regular human being. My Lois Lane doctor was tough as nails, strong willed, and wanted me to be the same.  She kept me grounded and let me cry when I wanted to cry.  She even cried with me a few times.

These two doctors were wonderful together and apart.  I am so glad my heart was mended with a little love around.

I am beyond grateful for the whole team of doctors and nurses who gave me my life back, stitched and fixed.  For them, I’ll make sure to live life harder and better because thanks to them, I have a second chance!


Thank you family!

June 10, 2009
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I am lucky.  So so lucky.  Lucky that I had the most supportive and caring family ever.  This has hopefully been the most traumatic experience of my life.   I really don’t know what I would have done without the comfort of these three very important people.  They were my breath blood and heartbeats when I needed them.

Dad-thank you for the flowers from the muffler shop, for dealing with the kitchen sink noodle explosion in my apartment, for sharing the gummy penguin snacks* with me, for being in LA 12 hours after I was in the ER and the following 15 days after that, and for being such a wonderful father.

Mom-thank you for your support in my second week in the hospital and two weeks after, for saving my water bottles in case I need them again, for talking to me that night at 4am until I was calm enough to go back to sleep, for safely driving my Prius, and for being such a wonderful mother.

Melissa-thank you for calling incessantly and wanting to be next to me with mom and dad in the hospital, for learning how to do laundry for me, for making that beautiful cake, for keeping me calm and bringing me back to reality, and for being my wonderful big sister.

Dad, Mom and MelissaIf my family were gummy snacks they would be sweet and funny like these penguin treats

*DeDe- thanks for supplying these Penguin snacks!

No hot doctors? Fall in love with your painkiller.

June 6, 2009
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Dilaudid, I loved you. This potent painkiller sedated my sobs away during the painful times before and after my surgery. I needed it most of the time I asked for it. Honestly, there were probably a few rendezvous that may have occurred under false pretenses, or perhaps that were not of 100% necessity. But love is irrational sometimes, sometimes it’s wrong but it feels right. Sorry Dilaudid, I’m grateful for the time we spent together, but it had to end. You’ll have affairs with others who can serve you with a greater level of commitment.

Cut to reality-I don’t mean to be insensitive, addiction to Dilaudid can happen even with short-term use. For me, Dilaudid induced a euphoric, emotionally numbing feeling, in addition to physical numbness. Had the nurses offered me a take-home cup  I wouldn’t have refused.

Cut from reality- lucky for me, after I was out of the hospital and separated from Dilaudid, I didn’t look back. This was my first painless break-up!

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Hi! My name is Heather and I write a blog :) I hope you enjoy!